My neighbor saw me feeding peanut-butter radishes to Zeetha the other day. He was irate. He said that radishes are toxic for felines, that I was overstepping my bounds, and that I should be ashamed of myself. I told my neighbor that while radish greens are poisonous for cats, the root is a healthful treat, and he should be thankful for my attentiveness. He said that if he ever sees me feeding Allie again — he calls her Allie — he would report me to the police. He is a cruel man with poor taste in names.